Up till a concert a few days ago, everything seems to be ok even though if all hell is stacked upon me I'll cope with it. I've always dreamt of bed of soft green grass even though I am absolutely sure that there are none of those waiting for me to lie on. Or maybe I have been too idealistic in life, always dreaming of an utopia form the corner of my brain that everything is set and settled in my head, anything that I do which I am indifferent will be the one I like later on in life (or at least be damn good at it).
But then Joshua Radin came to London. I was never a fan of this dude, someone made me go for that concert. But half way through the concert, something struck my head. This man was a songwriter and one day he decided to be a singer 5-6 years ago. Now he's an 'upcoming' singer (or at least he looked like he's enjoying the songs he's churning out and make good dough out of it) So he enjoys his stuff, so what? But wait, he is enjoying his stuff, but what about me? Am I going to be the person that when I look at my future self I'll be the successful person I've been dreaming of, having a job which I have passion in or at least a well paid professional job? Assuming he is enjoying his stuff, he is now in my words living his life as he wants it to be. So, is he the majority, or the privileged few who could enjoy what he aspires to be in the past?
Then fear came in to me. The future is so uncertain, how exactly Man could move on with so many uncertainties? Man craves certainty; law is a perfect example of our desires. Courts love justice, but I think in all actual truth I think the courts love precedents and legal certainty rather than justice. Maybe that is the reason why people love Lord Denning, with equal numbers who scorn him (I secretly believe people do not like the way he judges, especially other judges) as he would always find a way to put 'justice' first than precedents, certainty or principles.
Back to the main topic, this Joshua Radin struck me so hard that I actually feel sad and have self-pity upon myself even though I don't give a rats ass about him or his songs. Assumptions again, he is actually ENJOYING what he is doing and as for me, well it is up to Fate to show what I'm going to have. The only comfort for me is if I put enough effort/determination/whatever you call it, I could change the course of Fate. But will it be for the better or worse? I do not know.
